An ilander friend was talking about suicide recently. What prompts someone to talk or think so? How much hardship is enough? Which twist of destiny is unfortunate? Or irreparable? Till what extent one may fight back? And when does one give up? Take a look at this family.

Raj, Mona & Bonny are siblings. Children of an honest, sincere and brilliant service personnel and an efficient and well educated homemaker.

Raj was especially brilliant and so his dad wanted him to join the Indian Administrative Services. Raj had a different dream though – of Mercedes and posh bunglows. Eventually he migrated to the US and settled there. His marriage ceremony to an American Indian girl was a low key affair. He underwent a violent marriage for about a year that eventually broke, followed by long spells of depression, longer solitude to develop a strong affinity towards spirituality before he met his soulmate in India. He and his soulmate took the pains of living separately for two years post marriage due to unavoidable reasons, one staying in US and other in the ‘tough & harsh on ladies’ Delhi environment. They are a spiritually happy couple now with a bonny baby. Touch wood. He works in a company owned by Warren Buffet and has renounced most of the worldly comforts apart from the bare minimum. He also wishes to come back to serve his ageing parents and asks if the small cars in India come with an AC so that he may settle for one !

Bonny turned out to be a gold medallist. Mummy dear wished her to join Raj in the US do some higher studies and settle there. Search for an US bound groom was on. But she chose to join her own chosen man and start life. Her marriage ceremony was again another low key affair with only the groom’s brother’s support. Life was not only tough but harsh initially. The couple went through several ups and downs in their initial years of couplehood to eventually establish themselves as accountable individuals in this big bad world with their never say die approach. Touch wood again. Does Bonny ever repent not going to US for higher studies? Unlikely. Rather she talks of going for a month-long tour of Europe someday soon with money earned in India!

Mona was married off in a grand way with a great ceremony. The greatest ceremony that has taken place in the family so far. She was also the first one to be married off among the siblings. A year later she was blessed with a bonny child doubling up the happiness in the family. Unlike her siblings, she did not complete her post graduation amidst these life changing events. Neither her husband inspired her to. Two years later things began to change. Mona started staying back with her parents for months once she came to visit them and her husband never urged for the return of his wife or child. Raj used to go drop his sister and nephew home. The marriage turned sour and gradually violent too. They started living separately in two different cities. The child stayed with Mona. They were financed by her husband though, which was not enough and her parents lended a helping had every now and then without asking. Everyone wanted her to be independent now and repented her not completing her post graduation. She gradually turned violent out of depression and her child lacked the desired parental attention and care. Mona blamed her parents too accusing they did not educate her enough like her siblings and did not allow them help her. At the age of 6 her child had to be adopted by her parents to give him a better and safer life. Mona cut all ties with her parents. Every effort of all uncles, aunts, Raj & Bonny to revive her back to life went futile. Four years later, her husband stopped the remaining traces of support to her and she was almost dragged to the roads. She went missing for one full day when her parents, uncles and aunts looked for her all around the city, ultimately to find her sitting in a devastated state at the doorsteps of her parental home. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief to see her there. It was almost midnight, her mother had almost lost hope while they were returning home. But that was probably the dawn of a new life for Mona after the traumatic eight years.

Its been four years since. Mona is struggling back to life with incessant support of her aging parents and her own son, 14, who is maturing fast experiencing major twists and turns of life. An effort to become self sufficient is still on though.

I think Mona is the bravest and strongest child among the three siblings, given the way she is fighting back to life having gone through the greatest trauma and bouts of depression. May be the sole purpose of her life is to look after her aging parents in their hour of need and she is being prepared just for that.

And what about that aging parent couple who’s seen one broken marriage, a depressed son, another devastating marriage and a traumatic daughter, a 6 yr old grand child on the verge of going astray, never ending visits to the court to fight for the rights of their daughter yet not missing a single daily religious ritual back home. How much hardship is enough hardship? Raj, Mona & Bonny are very close to my heart.

Thinking of suicide is plain cowardice. One life is 100 yrs long. If you are 70, you still have 30 more years to start living a great life! Life after sunset, too, is wonderful.